Deep thought before bed -- I'll see you, TOMORROW

I should've been already sleep by now but I don't feel like doing so. Tomorrow is my first day of work for a new job. Actually, it's just a training, but a paid one too. Tomorrow will be the start of another big change in my life. After a year and almost 5 months of not having a full time, I'm gonna start one tomorrow. It will be hard, but I know that it'd only be in the beginning and soon, I'm gonna get used to it again. Tomorrow, my son's life will change coz he's gonna start attending school at a young age of 3. Tomorrow will be my first time being separated from my son for the whole day and it'd one of the hardest thing, above all.

Getting this full time was a very big decision that I did on my own but with my husband's full support and guidance from God, so I know I did the right thing. But a part of me is worried, especially about my son. I know, in my mind and in my heart, that he's gonna be alright. He's gonna have fun and learn a lot of things in school, but I know that we'll gonna be missing each other so much, I don't think I can bear it. But I need to work which is the best for his future. And him in school is what's good for him too, so that he can develop his interrelationship with other people and being independent.

Ever since I got the job offer, I have been always thinking about this. God knows how happy I am with the new blessing that He gave to us. A job that I like with everything that I needed. But things aren't always perfect. Though I got what I wanted, this time is a huge obstacle for me between my son and my family. I guess I'll just to pass through this obstacle just like what I did with all the other ones that I've been through to prove that I deserve all of this blessing. I know, life should be always like this. But I'm only human and I'm not strong. I have God with me and that's all I can depend on. He had never left me and I'm sure that He never will.

Goodnight!